


Broken and Blue

by imposibledoctor



Series: Itty Bitty Destiel Fics [12]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Depression, Dinner, M/M, Poetry, Self-Worth Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-12
Updated: 2014-11-12
Packaged: 2018-02-25 03:20:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2606570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imposibledoctor/pseuds/imposibledoctor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anonymous whispered: Sam starts uni and meets Gabriel in one of his classes. They become friends and Gabriel invites Sam to dinner at his house and tells him to invite Dean. Dean goes with Sam, meets Cas, sparks fly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Broken and Blue

**Author's Note:**

> Note: because this prompt left a lot of room to do whatever I wanted to do with it, I think I may actually be continuing this one.  
> Also please ignore my crappy poetry.
> 
> **Warning for low-self worth

"C’mon Dean, please. Gabriel wants to meet you." Sam whined over the phone.

"I don’t want to meet your weird friend. Unless he has a hot sister." Dean replied.

"Dean, it’s free food, just come, okay? I’ll text you his address, be there at 7." Sam hung up, not giving Dean anymore room to argue.

Dean sighed and glanced at his watch,  _5:44._ It was about a 45 minute drive to the college so Dean began getting ready, not really knowing whether he should dress nicely or not.

At 6:30 Dean got in his car, settling on jeans and a black button-up shirt, and put the address into his GPS.

 

"Hey, you must be Dean." A blonde man opened the door. Dean could see Sam in the background with a beer in his hand. 

"Thanks for, uh, inviting me." Dean said, awkwardly. 

"No problem, Dean-o. Sam talks about you all the time." 

Dean walked into the house, noticing how nice it was. Large flat screen TV, granite counters, leather couch, nothing like his own apartment. He said hi to Sam and took a beer from Gabriel. 

"Castiel! Stop being antisocial and get down here!" Gabriel yelled from the bottom of the stairs. "My brother is shy." He explained to Dean. Gabriel stood by the staircase, waiting, for a minute before sighing and coming back to the kitchen

Dean had to admit, he was enjoying himself. It was good to see Sam having fun and being good friends with someone.

“Did you need something, Gabriel?” The three men turned toward the source of the voice, coming from behind them. Dean nearly gasped when he saw a man, who appeared a little older than Gabriel, with ruffled dark hair and piercing blue eyes.

“Dean, this is my brother Castiel.” Gabriel introduced him.

“I assume you are Sam’s brother?” Castiel noted, his voice gravelly and beautiful.

“Y-yes.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Dean. Now, did you actually need something?”

“Yeah. I need you to come out of your room more than once a week.” Gabriel laughed and Castiel rolled his eyes but shuffled over to the kitchen and stood next to Dean.

The four of them ate burgers at the table and Dean told stories about dumb things Sam did as a kid. He found Castiel staring at him for a majority of the meal, and he tried to look anywhere but his blue eyes.

After dinner Sam and Gabriel retired to the couch to watch a football game, leaving Castiel and Dean at the kitchen table.

“Sam speaks highly of you.” Castiel said, trying to start a conversation.

Dean smiled, “Yeah? What’s he say?”

“He says you’re very funny. And that you are the best brother any guy could ask for.” Castiel said, seriously.

Dean sat back in his chair, pleased with himself.

“He says that you raised him, is that true?”

“Uh, yeah. Our mom died when we were young and dad wasn’t around much. He died too, a few years ago.” Dean said, surprised to be sharing his life story with a man he just met.

“I’m sorry, Dean. That must have been rough for you.” Castiel said, sympathetically.

“I’m okay. Anyway, what about you Cas?”

“What about me?”

“Tell me about yourself.” Dean took another sip of his beer and smiled at Castiel.

“I like to read.”

“Okay. What do you like to read?”

“Everything. Science Fiction, Romance, Mystery, anything.”

“You like to do anything else?”

“I write occasionally, but I’m not very good. I’m sorry, I’m not a very interesting person.” Castiel looked down at his own, untouched, beer.

“Yes you are. I’m sure your writing is beautiful.”  _But nothing can be quite as beautiful as your eyes,_ Dean wanted to add.

“I have a few of my poems upstairs if you’d like to read them.” Castiel offered.

“I’d love to.” He followed Castiel up the stairs and into a dark room.

Castiel turned the light on, revealing a relatively empty bedroom. There was a double bed, dressed with gray sheets and a black comforter, a large desk, and a bookshelf overflowing with well-worn books.

“Even my room is boring.” Castiel sighed.

“The walls match your eyes.” Dean said, blushing when he realized he said it out loud.

“My eyes are  _not_  that blue.”

“Yes they are. Actually they’re slightly bluer. The walls are a flat blue while yours shine and are almost silver around the edges.”

Castiel’s cheeks turned red and he went back to searching through a desk drawer. “Here.” He said, handing a small journal to Dean.

Dean flipped through it, and settled on a page with a short poem on it.

_Wrong_

_A single word etched in my mind_

_It plays like a song on repeat_

_Wrong_

_I open my eyes and the sun doesn’t shine_

_What’s the point of waking up anyway?_

_Wrong_

_It hits me like a wave and I can’t breathe_

_Why should I try when I’m always_

_Wrong_

_What can I do but sit and wait_

_Until someone, anyone, thinks that I’m_

_Right_

 

Dean flipped to another, thinking,  _hoping,_ that Cas just had a bad day when he wrote that one.

 

_Rejected, defected, and worn_

_You see me as a disaster zone of broken glass_

_You say that I’m shattered in a million pieces_

_that I can’t be fixed_

_You say that no one wants to see the mess_

_that I am, that I cause_

_I say that you’re right because_

_I am what I am;_

_Unwanted, unwelcomed, and torn_

“Cas?” Dean choked out.

“Yes?”

“These are beautiful, but…” Dean walked a little closer to Cas, “is this how you see yourself?”

“Usually, yes.”

 

Dean sighed and sat down at the desk, grabbing a pen and flipping to a page in the back of the journal.

“What are you doing?” Cas asked, confused.

“Shhh.” Dean silenced him and began writing.

 

_There are stars in your eyes_

_And constellations trace your face_

_When you smile I see the sun_

_You make me feel like outer space_

 

_I’ve never felt so flightless_

_Til I stood right here with you_

_All my life I’ve looked at colors_

_But I’ve never seen that shade of blue_

_It kills me to see you like this_

_To know that you can’t see_

_All the beauty held inside you_

_All the beauty you won’t free_

Cas read the page silently, and Dean looked away, not wanting to see the reaction.

“Dean?”

Dean took a deep breath and faced Castiel. “Oh, shit, you’re crying.” Dean nervously reached out for him. Castiel graciously entered Dean’s arms and laid his head against Dean’s chest.

“You’re not worthless, Cas.” Dean said, pressing his lips to Castiel’s hair.

“Thank you.” Cas hugged him tightly, not wanting Dean’s warmth to ever fade away.

 

_[kudos & comments appreciated! feel free to check out my [tumblr ](http://pumpkin-pie-dean.tumblr.com/)as well!]_


End file.
